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Author Topic: Story: Plain Jane  (Read 14584 times)

Offline xxxforce

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Re: Story: Plain Jane
« Reply #45 on: 07. December 2021, 12:30:38 PM »
Nice work! I hope her treatment is similar to the dream she had!

That would really be VERY unrealistic and destroy the whole story

Offline Sparky

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Re: Story: Plain Jane
« Reply #46 on: 07. December 2021, 13:42:55 PM »
OMG, my readers are disagreeing about my story  :-)

---------------

Chapter 16


Jane walked over to Sarah's desk. "Hey, Sarah, you doing anything this lunchtime?" she asked. Jane had finally mustered up the courage to deal with an 'issue' that she had, and she needed Sarah's advice.

"No, why"

"Can I take you out to somewhere for a sandwich, there's.... err.. something I need to talk to you about...."

"Yeah, I'm up for that. What time?"

"I was thinking that if we went at, say, 12:15 we might beat the rush..."

"Fine with me..."

----

Jane had bought both of them sandwiches and bottles of juice, and they had found a quiet corner to sit.

"You know, I really don't know how I would have managed this last year without you and Simon." said Jane, "and over the last couple of weeks, I've felt that we're got so much closer together, it's like I've lost my own brother, but I gained a new brother and sister".

When Peter had died, Sarah didn't actually know Jane all that well, but sensed that Jane needed someone to talk to, or to just be with, so had decided to get to know Jane, and see if she could help. The problem Sarah had was that Jane seemed to want to keep a lot of stuff to herself, but even so, she quickly realised that just being there for Jane was being appreciated. And even though Jane wasn't the most outgoing of people, once she got to know her, she found she was actually a nice person.

Along the way, Jane had met Sarah's brother, Simon, and they seemed to get on pretty well too. And then, over the last week or two, the anniversary of Peter's death, Jane started to finally open up, and both Sarah and Simon started to really get to know Jane, and help her along her journey of healing.

And yes, she understood what Jane meant, she had started to think of Jane as someone she knew and trused as much as she knew and trusted her brother. And it was even nicer to hear that Jane felt the same way.

"I'm glad you think of us like that... "

Jane took a deep breath. What she was about to say to Sarah was a massive thing for her. Should she even actually tell her? Heck, that was the whole 'why' that she had asked Sarah along for lunch.

"The thing is, I have a problem, and I'm really not sure what to do about it..."

"What's the problem?" asked Sarah gently.

Jane took another deep breath: she was rather nervous about what she was about to say, but tried to explain things as best she could, while Sarah listened. What Jane said wasn't actually THAT much of a surprise to Sarah, what was more of a surprise was that Jane was actually confiding in her.

"I'm guessing from the look on your face that you might need a bit of my help..."

"Please...". They sat quitely for a few moments, eating their lunches.

"Come over for tea tonight" suggested Sarah, "and we can talk about it after tea.... don't worry, I'll help you".

Thus it was arranged that Jane would join Simon and Sarah for tea: after work, Jane went home with Sarah, and helped her make it.

"Oh, hello" said Simon when he got home.

"I thought it would be nice to invite Jane over" said Sarah

"Always nice to see you, Jane" said Simon.

Soon after, tea was ready, and soon after that, it was all eaten. Simon looked as if he was about to get up and leave the table.

"Simon, don't get up just yet....". Simon didn't have any idea what was going on, but nevertheless did as his sister asked. Sarah leaned over, taking Simon's hand in her left hand, and Jane's in her right.

"Jane and I had lunch together today" explained Sarah. "She was saying how much she has appreciated having us around, how she has appreciated our friendship.... so much so that she feels we're almost like family. Then she told me something else, and I think she needs to explain that bit herself. Simon, I need you to just listen to what she says, and don't interrupt her, because I know this isn't going to be easy for her.... I guess it's over to you, Jane..."

Jane closed her eyes for a couple of seconds, taking a big breath, then exhaling it, trying very hard to relax herself. What she was about to say would not be easy, and she was so glad that Sarah was holding her hand right now.

"As Sarah said, I've... I've really appreciated both of you just being there for me... this last year has been hard for me, and having you there has helped so much.... especially the last few weeks. Since telling you about things in the park, and your encouraging me to talk with mum and dad, I've felt like a weight has been taken off me.... I also feel that... that I've grown a lot closer to both of you, you guys almost feel like you are my brother and sister....". Jane paused a second or two. "Except.... Except I think that... my... my feelings for you, Simon... go a bit beyond just... brotherly love. You probably don't realise quite how hard that is for me to say... but Sarah persuaded me that.... NOT saying anything might be worse for me. So now I'm... I'm just scared that either you're going to... to think me silly, because you have no similar feelings for me.... or that maybe... maybe you DO have some feelings for me... but we do something about it, then something goes wrong and we both regret it... and I might then lose you... and Sarah... as my friends." Jane paused again, and took a couple more deep breaths: clearly that had not been easy for Jane to say. "So there: I've been honest in my feelings.... and I think maybe I need to just shut up now!"

"Simon," said Sarah, "my darling brother, please think about what you're going to say before you say it... I can feel that Jane is very nervous and apprehensive.

"Don't worry sis, I'm not going to do anything to upset Jane." He turned to Jane..."Well Jane, what you just said isn't actually that much od a surprise to be honest..." said Simon. "I've been having feelings about you too, and I was too scared to do anything about them too. I guess now we are talking about it, that option goes away. So does the 'I don't have feelings about you', because I do have feelings for you. So yes, I'm not sure what we should do, I don't want to risk losing you as a friend either, I like being with you, I even like it when you 'just around'." Simon looked at his sister.. so did Jane. "So sis, any magical solution?"

"Well, I think you guys need to do something, I don't think you can ignore those feelings, you'd both regret it if you did. However, I think you need to take things slowly. VERY slowly. And I think you both need to be totally honest with each other, no secrets, no little fibs, be totally honest. Is that something you can both do, do you think?" said Sarah. "Remember, I'll be here, if either of you need my help or advice, at any time"

Jane looked at Simon, and Simon looked at Jane. Nothing was said for several seconds.

"What do you think, Jane, want to give it a go? I promise not to rush things, and I'll do my best to be honest with you...." asked Simon, putting his hand gently onto Jane's.

"Yes, I'd like that, and I'll try to be as honest as I can too". Jane looked at Sarah. "Thank you Sarah".

"Hey, you two are my brother and my ... well, my sister, what else could I do? Look, Simon, why don't you take Jane to the pub, and start really getting to know her? And Jane... be nice to my big brother, will you?" Sarah stood up. "Come here, you two....".  Simon and Jane came over to Sarah, who hugged them both. "I love you guys..."



Offline Braceface2015

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Re: Story: Plain Jane
« Reply #47 on: 07. December 2021, 13:51:49 PM »
Everyone has their own ideas as to what they want to see in a story. Sparky will write what he feels the story should have in it. Feedback is always appreciated by any writer and can help to shape a story.

I always encourage other people to write their own stories and share them with us. It is interesting to see what other people come up with. I don't just collect stories, I also write them for myself and share them with others. I always enjoy what Sparky writes and have most of his stories in my collection.

Offline silver-moon-2000

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Re: Story: Plain Jane
« Reply #48 on: 07. December 2021, 14:25:16 PM »
OMG, my readers are disagreeing about my story  :-)

Isn't that the fun about the whole thing?  >:D
After all, it shows that you readers (like me ;D ) are invested in your story and want to see it continued

Offline acornjohn2001

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Re: Story: Plain Jane
« Reply #49 on: 07. December 2021, 15:17:09 PM »
Oh no, Jane stopped lisping!

Offline Sparky

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Re: Story: Plain Jane
« Reply #50 on: 07. December 2021, 17:35:36 PM »
Oh no, Jane stopped lisping!

Well, no, it's more that she never actually STARTED lisping :-) It was just a dream. Honest!

I wonder how bad her speech will be be after she gets braces.

Actually, here's an idea... back near the beginning of the story, I described her problems:

So, her top molar teeth are a bit close together, from one side to the other, and tip inwards a bit. So are her bottom ones, but not so bad. None of her teeth actually line up... her molars aren't in any sort of straight line, although only a couple of her small molars are crooked / rotated.

All four of her canine teeth are up (or down) in her gums. None of her bottom front teeth line up, they are all twisted and staggered, and at the top, her front two teeth stick inwards (inside her lower teeth), and the next ones are (rotated) at about 45 degrees.

It also seems that she has 4 lovely and pristine wisdom teeth fully erupted at the back of her mouth, apparently causing part of her problems.


What treatment would you prescribe her?

Offline acornjohn2001

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Re: Story: Plain Jane
« Reply #51 on: 07. December 2021, 17:52:54 PM »
It sounds very complicated, she will need expanders on both jaws, slipping plate on her bottom front teeth to help her upper incisors to get forward, elastics on your canines and of course headgear but it is on you, you are her "father", so do what you think she needs

Offline m1090y

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Re: Story: Plain Jane
« Reply #52 on: 09. December 2021, 11:03:39 AM »
I certainly makes any treatment that much more intriguing on her when the character is so well developed.

Offline Embracer

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Re: Story: Plain Jane
« Reply #53 on: 09. December 2021, 12:04:31 PM »
I hope she gets invisalign :)

Offline Sparky

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Re: Story: Plain Jane
« Reply #54 on: 09. December 2021, 15:51:33 PM »
I hope she gets invisalign :)

Wash that mouth out with soap!!!!!! Although I'm sure it's something Jane might ask for....

Offline Sparky

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Re: Story: Plain Jane
« Reply #55 on: 09. December 2021, 15:58:29 PM »
Chapter 17

Simon and Jane are sat at a small table opposite each other at the pub, looking at each other.

It's really the first time that Simon has properly looked at Jane close up. He can see that Jane doesn't wear much makeup, which doesn't really matter, because, even close up, her skin looks nice. Simon's eyes continued to scan Jane's face. He noticed that her nose was not perfect: it was possibly a little to big for the rest of her face, but that didn't really matter... nor did the tiny bump in it. Jane had slightly bushy eyebrows, which I guess some guys woudn't like, but they were really just part of who Jane was. Little did Simon realise how Jane felt about these tiny imperfections.

Simon's eyes were drawn to Jane's eyes. Simon thought Jane's eyes were quite stunning, with or without her glasses: Jane wore a tiny bit of eye-shadow, and a little mascara, which actually highlighted their lovely dark blue colour nicely. Jane's glasses weren't all that strong, so didn't distort the look of her lovely eyes at all.

Of course, while Simon's eyes were looking at Jane, they have been talking... nothing special, just general chat. But they both felt amazingly relaxed in each other's company: Sarah had told them they needed to be honest and open with each other. So that's what they were doing, and it was quite an inspirational feeling for them both.

"You know, I DO like your new hair style! And the colour too!" said Simon. The fringe really changed the shape of her face, and Simon thought it actually worked a lot better for Jane

"Thank you, Simon! I had long hair for SOOO long, it's actually nice to have it shorter... although I still find it odd at times" said Jane. "The colour was a bit of a 'spur of the moment thing', but yeah, I like it too!"

Whilst Jane has had her 'new' haircut for a couple of weeks, she was still getting used to it, and kept playing with it. As she pulled her hair back, Simon could see Jane's ear, and saw something he'd never noticed before: a tiny thin tube that came over the top of her ear, and went into her ear.

"Jane..." said Simon quietly - he didn't want to embarass Jane by asking this too loudly - "erm, I'm not wanting to be nosey, but.... is that a hearing aid I just saw?". Whether Sarah knew that Jane wore hearing aids, Simon didn't know, but she'd certainly never mentioned them to Simon.

Normally, Jane might have found that question to be a bit awkward, embarassing even. But Simon and Jane were specifically trying to learn about each other, and her hearing problems, and thus her hearing aids, were a part of her, just as her glasses were. Since getting the hearing aids, she had thought several times how it was odd that having glasses was absolutely 'normal' and 'ok', but there was still quite a stigma attached to having hearing aids. Kinda like how kids used to hate braces ten or twenty years ago, but now they were almost 'cool'.

"Yes, I have two of them.... you're the first person who has actually noticed them"

"Well, they are pretty well invisible: your hair normally covers your ears, so it was only when you pulled your hair back a second ago that I noticed that tiny tube. How long have you had them?"

"Just over a month ago now, I guess... just before we started getting closer...".

So, a bit of history: Jane has known Sarah for a few years now, through work, but as we know, Jane isn't the most sociable of people. Yes, she's ok with people she has got to know, like the 3 others in her band.... and when she's on stage, well, that's not Jane, it's more of a facade, so that doesn't really count. Much of Jane's life had centered around the love of her life: her brother Peter. So it was only when Peter died that Jane and Sarah started to get to know each other properly. And over the last year, Jane had met Simon on several occasions too, so had started to consider him as a friend too. Jane was very appreciative that both Simon and Sarah had been there for her, unconditionally. The day they had gone on the bike ride, and she had started crying up the top of the hill was typical of their selfless friendship. Also the evening that Simon met with Jane at the park. In fact, I would say that was the day that Simon and Jane 'started getting closer'.

"I never realised you had a hearing problem...."

"It's not too bad when it's quiet, and there's no background noise, it's more when the people themselves are talking softly, and there's a bit of background noise... or they are over the other side of the office"

"And do the hearing aids really help?"

"A lot of the time they are really amazing: in the office I can hear people so much better, so I can join in the conversations more easily. It odd, noone at work has actually commented that I'm joining in more. And out in the countryside, like when we were out on that bike ride, as long as they're not catching the wind, I can hear so much more - for example, I can hear birds again!"

"I'm guessing they must be pretty comfortable, because I've never seen you play with them"

"They are amazingly comfortable! Let me show you...". Jane pulled one of her hearing aids out, and showed it to Simon: not only was the tube that went from the hearing aid into her ear tiny (only 1 or 2 mm in diameter), the hearing aid itself was too - something like only 2 or 3 cm long. On the end of the slim tube that went into her ear there was a tiny and delicate 'umbrella'.

"Wow, it really is tiny... my grandpa wears hearing aids, and they are at least twice the size, with thick plastic tubes.... , I mean, this one is almost invisible by comparison. So what's that bit for" asked Simon, pointing at the umbrella.

"The idea with these hearing aids is that they just add in just the high frequencies, so can use a thin tube... I hear the lower frequencies naturally.  So, as I understand it, as well as holding the tube in place in my ear, that bit helps to stop any high-pitched whistling, by blocking the sound."

"So doesn't that stop you hearing?"

"No, it just stops the high frequencies, lower frequencies don't seem to be affected. But they are so light and so comfortable... I often forget I'm actually wearing them now I've got used to them". Jane put the hearing aid back into her ear.

It was strange: Simon was the first person that she'd had any meaningful conversation about her hearing aids, but she actually felt completely at ease talking to him about it.

"So any idea what caused your hearing problems?"

"We think it was loud music: I used to love standing next to the guitar amps when we were practising! I never realised I was messing up my hearing...."

As Jane was talking, Simon's eyes were attracted to her mouth, and more specifically her teeth. Jane actually has nice teeth, it's just that they were crooked, and her top two teeth went inside her bottom teeth. oh, and her 4 canines were all in the wrong place. But that didn't really matter to Simon, but he knew it mattered to Jane.

"So, you have glasses and now you have hearing aids... you ever going to get the braces to complete the set?" he asked her with a huge smile.

"You know, the other night I had a bit of a scary dream about braces..."

"In what way?"

"Well, I was at the orthodontist, and I was getting braces - far too many braces! I think it's the same dream I had as a teenager, when I didn't want braces... I'd actually forgotten about it, but when I woke up from it, it seemed very familiar, and I think that was part the reason I didn't want braces. But you're right, I think it's about time I actually DID something. So, a question for you: you said you'd come along with me, and I'd still very much like that, so... when's a good time for you?"

"In principle it doesn't matter - like you I do flexible hours, so as long as I have some notice it's usually ok."

"In that case, I'll call a couple of places and book appointments"


Offline annasun251

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Re: Story: Plain Jane
« Reply #56 on: 10. December 2021, 16:11:25 PM »
Thanks for updating so regularly!

Offline blueblur1997

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Re: Story: Plain Jane
« Reply #57 on: 10. December 2021, 17:38:38 PM »
I'm wondering what treatment she'll get. I'm hoping for expanders and headgear.

Offline braces37

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Re: Story: Plain Jane
« Reply #58 on: 11. December 2021, 08:28:06 AM »
You have a really good idea here, using the braces to help develop the Jane/Simon relationship. The entire story has excellent character work.

Offline franci

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Re: Story: Plain Jane
« Reply #59 on: 11. December 2021, 10:26:34 AM »
Hello I just finished reading the last chapter of your story.
As a woman I find her really interested, I assure you that it is not easy to show your flaws in front of the man you like ..
Because it is evident that Jane will fall in love soon right?
Still great job.
Good boy.
Hello Francesca
'm love braces