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Author Topic: Story: Cloe's Amazing Find!  (Read 9495 times)

Offline dominek000

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Story: Cloe's Amazing Find!
« on: 28. February 2021, 23:38:30 PM »
     Chapter 1

Maybe let's start with how it all started ...
My name is Cloe, I'm 19, I'm a college student. I have always dreamed of getting braces. Unfortunately, I come from a poor family, so my parents could never afford to buy a braces. Today, when I was browsing the internet, I came across a website where you can buy various types of braces, everything I always dreamed about was there. The prices were lower than the real harness, but it was still too expensive for me.

The next day, when I was at school, during a cigarette break, I hid in the bushes as usual. Of course, smoking was strictly prohibited at school. Suddenly, I noticed my teacher coming from across the street. I quickly hid deep into the bushes. The teacher just looked my way and then left for school. I felt a nudge with my right foot. I turned to see a pink box. Small size, someone must have thrown it there recently as it didn't look damaged. I wondered what was inside and if I should open it. Curiosity prevailed! When I opened the box, I couldn't believe what I saw. It was like a dream come true, as if an angel threw it from heaven for me. Just yesterday I dreamed of how great it would be to have braces, and now I open the box, and in it what ?! Ladies and gentlemen, yes! There was a set of braces in the box. Clip-on, fixed braces with a herbst appliance and a double expander. There was also a headgear inside. I quickly took the box, put it in my backpack, and ran back to class. Throughout the rest of the lessons I was wondering why the hell someone threw it out, who did they belong to, would they fit me? I couldn't wait to get home and take a closer look at it. I couldn't believe how lucky I was.

 The end of chapter 1...

Offline acornjohn2001

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Re: Story: Cloe's Amazing Find!
« Reply #1 on: 01. March 2021, 13:27:51 PM »
Great start!

Offline bracessd

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Re: Story: Cloe's Amazing Find!
« Reply #2 on: 01. March 2021, 17:09:28 PM »
Nice job!

Offline retained

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Re: Story: Cloe's Amazing Find!
« Reply #3 on: 02. March 2021, 01:37:21 AM »
Interested!!

Offline kelly-Marie

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Re: Story: Cloe's Amazing Find!
« Reply #4 on: 02. March 2021, 01:41:39 AM »
Good start can't wait to read more

Offline Braceface2015

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Re: Story: Cloe's Amazing Find!
« Reply #5 on: 02. March 2021, 12:03:50 PM »
I have added the start of the story to TheArchive. It looks like a promising start to what may be a good story.

Braceface2015
TheArchive2018

Offline Taxy

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Re: Story: Cloe's Amazing Find!
« Reply #6 on: 04. March 2021, 13:25:41 PM »
This looks like a really promising start! I can't wait for more!

Offline caster72401

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Re: Story: Cloe's Amazing Find!
« Reply #7 on: 10. March 2021, 15:19:20 PM »
Great start! I really hope you will continue!

Offline Tin_Grin8444

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Re: Story: Cloe's Amazing Find!
« Reply #8 on: 14. March 2021, 09:42:36 AM »
I would LOVE to see a chapter 2 if you're able! I'm liking this concept!  ;D

Offline agarionoob

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Re: Story: Cloe's Amazing Find!
« Reply #9 on: 14. March 2021, 10:02:48 AM »
A really interesting idea! Looking forward to seeing more.

Offline retained

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Re: Story: Cloe's Amazing Find!
« Reply #10 on: 14. March 2021, 18:43:17 PM »
Next chapter please !

Offline Qwertj

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Re: Story: Cloe's Amazing Find!
« Reply #11 on: 20. May 2021, 06:36:54 AM »
Amazing start.

Offline Qwertj

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Re: Story: Cloe's Amazing Find!
« Reply #12 on: 11. September 2021, 22:21:51 PM »
Can't wait for the next chapter.

Offline dominek000

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Re: Story: Cloe's Amazing Find!
« Reply #13 on: 20. October 2021, 00:06:17 AM »
Chapter 2:

After returning home, I couldn't believe how lucky I was. I immediately ran to my room not paying attention to the suggestions of a joint dinner from my mother. The only thing I had in mind at that moment was to investigate my find as soon as possible! I closed the door to my room behind me, sat on the bed, and pulled a pink box out of my backpack. I opened it and this beautiful device appeared to my eyes. It was all metal with plastic plates. I have always had fairly straight teeth so there was a chance that they would fit this device. I was wondering if I should try them on. I didn't know who had it in their mouth before. Maybe someone seriously ill. It didn't take long for the fantasies to take over. I took the braces in my hands, brought them to my mouth, wiped my mouth, and put it on. At first, it did not want to enter. As if it didn't fit, I pressed harder and heard a click. MY TEETH IS STUBBED IN THIS DEVICE !!! It was such a fantastic feeling! The feeling of metal in the mouth! I was unable to undo the lower jaw through the herbst appliance. I tried to say something but only a completely incomprehensible lisp caused by the upper and lower expander came out. This device was really hellish. I am not surprised that someone threw them away if he had to wear them for more than an hour. After 5 minutes, my jaw was already aching! There was another device in the box. It was headgear. It looked like a bent wire. I knew where this was going to go. I put a headgear on and the feeling got even stronger. Pulling feeling. Soon even more pressure and discomfort followed. I got scared and decided to pull it off my teeth. I pulled hard, but it didn't help. I started crying. I couldn't ask anyone at home for help! What would they think of me !? I had no idea what to do. The next day I had to go to school because I had my matura exams! I also had to somehow survive the night with this damn painful device...

... The end of chapter 2 ...

Offline braces37

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Re: Story: Cloe's Amazing Find!
« Reply #14 on: 20. October 2021, 02:17:19 AM »
It's good to see a months old story getting an update. The story is coming along well.

Offline LispLover

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Re: Story: Cloe's Amazing Find!
« Reply #15 on: 20. October 2021, 16:46:29 PM »
Great story! Can’t wait for more.

Offline bracessd

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Re: Story: Cloe's Amazing Find!
« Reply #16 on: 20. October 2021, 17:03:38 PM »
This will be good!

Offline Teddybear

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Re: Story: Cloe's Amazing Find!
« Reply #17 on: 18. July 2022, 23:55:00 PM »
Nice, will there be a third chapter?

Offline dominek000

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Re: Story: Cloe's Amazing Find!
« Reply #18 on: 20. July 2022, 20:59:36 PM »
Chapter two.

After school was over, I ran home as fast as I could! Luckily, I live about 10 minutes from school. My parents work late so I was home alone! I went to my room as soon as possible, opened my backpack in which I hid my find and took out the braces! I still can't understand how it's possible someone threw it out ... Or maybe someone lost it? Maybe I should return them ..

I did not think for a long time and decided to try them on! I was slowly putting them in my mouth, trying to adjust it somehow. "Click !!" I heard a soft click that echoed all over my head! The orthodontic appliance has adjusted !!! OH MY GOD!!

I immediately felt the double expanders with my tongue! My mouth was really full! I felt the herbst push my lower jaw forward. I tried to withdraw my lower jaw but the herbst immediately blocked it, what a great feeling !!! I tried to say, "GOD, THAT IS FANTASTIC" but only a strong lisp was heard from my lips. I left the braces on for the next 15 minutes and suddenly felt pain. I took them out of my mouth to let my teeth rest a little. Those 15 minutes were the most wonderful time of my life, but over and over again I was beginning to understand why someone threw them out. They were definitely not comfortable, they looked like a torture device to someone who had to wear them 24/7.
However, there was one more thing in the box! Headgear…

End of the second chapter.

Offline Braceface2015

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Re: Story: Cloe's Amazing Find!
« Reply #19 on: 20. July 2022, 21:05:40 PM »
That should be chapter 3.

Offline retained

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Re: Story: Cloe's Amazing Find!
« Reply #20 on: 21. July 2022, 01:05:54 AM »
Definitely needs more. (There seem to be two chapter 2's ??)
Im liking the first one where they get stuck in by the way.!

Offline 8749

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Re: Story: Cloe's Amazing Find!
« Reply #21 on: 27. December 2023, 18:40:36 PM »
I like your story very much. Would you mind if I added a Chapter to it?